Toddlerhood is tough

This morning she said "otameel, oatmeel". It's the cutest thing ever. She sounds like a little person. Ever had a pet for a long time and you always wondered what they would sound like if they could talk? You get the idea. I love when she says new words so clearly and almost perfectly. It's like I'm talking to a 2 year old or something. She's still 19 months. Well, 19.5 to be exact. She watched me make her oatmeal and was fascinated. And it was only the microwave and water.

She usually enjoys oatmeal, but this morning as I sat her down to eat, she took one bite and started screaming. Unhappy. She kept eating. Unhappy. I'm tired of asking her what's wrong, like I can fix it, so I gave her some milk and fruit and let her just do what she was doing. She calmed down after a bit. I think she was so hungry that she was ticked she had to use her hands to slowly get bits of oatmeal into her mouth (I tried to thicken it, credit here)...since she still stinks at getting the spoon to her mouth without dumping all her food out.

Paul left while she was eating and I was only half dressed, which was fine, except these days the child gets oral antibiotics, ear drop antibiotics, and forced tooth brushing and forced hair brushing. The ear drops go OK, but the oral meds are hit or miss. If you leave it out for her long enough in the little cup, she'll get curious enough to go over and take it all. But sometimes if you just ask her to take it, these days she'll either be cooperative and drink up, or just downright refuse. She used to love taking meds, it was so easy. Now it's on her terms (just like the tooth brushing). Adding more time it takes to get out the door. I was tired of the games this morning, so I had to resort to holding her down to get the meds in. That was no fun but at least she didn't spit it back at me.

All of this resistance made us late getting out the door. At least she still enjoys putting her shoes on at this time.

After changing her poopy diaper (just great), which amounted to more resistance, I could actually feel my anger building, and the loss of control that would soon follow if we didn't just get out the door soon. I don't think I even finished getting myself dressed. We just fled and were still late.

I am getting tired of "nice mommy" and she is only 19.5 months old. It's about time to put the smack down. Too many games just wear me out and drag on and on. You can't blame me for trying...trying to just give her a chance to do the right thing...or trick her into doing the right thing. Any parent who's been here before recognizes my mistakes and realizes I'd eventually come to this conclusion myself...that for the most part it's going to be mommy's way or else.

Here come the planes!

One by one we can hear and see all the different types of planes coming to land at Ellington Field for the Wings Over Houston Airshow. This air force base is just right down the street from my neighborhood so we have front row seats to the fun every year. Anna is going nuts pointing them out all the time. It's non-stop and fabulous! Her head is going to explode (in a good way) when we take her to the actual air show this Saturday. We can't wait to see her reactions. And the weather should be beautiful.

She hearts airplanes, big time. How cool is THAT?

**

Today she didn't even cry when Paul left her at her classroom. Wow. When I picked her up, her teacher blew her a kiss bye-bye and Anna blew one back. As we left the room, she looked through the window, pointed at her napping buddy and said, "ocky, ocky, ocky". She said his name all the way down the hall. I am relieved because other than AS, all her other toddler buddies moved up to the next class in August. She used to ask for them but hasn't in awhile. I am glad she's found some new names!

You can do that??

Yesterday I took an hour and a half off of work to get my hair cut and highlighted. I've always thought I was lucky to have a job that allowed me the freedom to come and go like this because there's no way I have the nerve to bring Anna with me and expect her to fully cooperate the entire time. Not even for a quick haircut! How can I chase her around with my hair cape flying in the wind? Talk about an uneven cut.

So you can imagine my incredible AWE when I witnessed this woman pleasantly getting her hair colored, while her 14 month old and 3 year old sat patiently for around 2.5 hours!! I mean, no fussing no fighting, no running, no screeching. This woman even had the nerve to have calm, fun conversations with her stylists as she was getting her scalp massaged and hair washed in the seat next to me.

Me to my colorist: I know you're only 20 but do you comprehend the magnitude of what's going on over there? Let me explain why I thought this kind of thing didn't happen in this universe. Where do these kids come from?

My colorist: Yeah, actually that's impressive.

Me: Well if she's a SAHM I guess she just has done it lots of times before because she had to make it work, so these kids just must be good at behaving themselves?? Just used to it?? It's the double edged sword I have with Anna. I have anxiety about taking her out when I need calmness or patience or I need to think. So she usually stays home with Daddy or I do this stuff by taking off of work! Do you think this mom knows how good these kids are being? It's amazing!

Colorist: I have a two year old brother...blah blah blah....

Later I got close to the mom and had to snoop. It's something I've taken to since Anna's been born. Normally I'm not a talker :)

Me to mom: your kids are amazingly well-behaved!

Mom: Yeah, I'm really shocked! I've never done something like this so this was a test to see what would happen. I was so nervous about this!

Ah...OK so some moms do just take the plunge and try it. Even with tin foil in their hair, knowing they can't get up and chase their 3 year old when she decides to run off. Even when she has to sit under the hair dryer for 15 min.

Surely her 14 month old must be down to one nap per day? Or surely she can nap in public in her stroller (unlike Anna)?

I am a fully accomplished, intelligent, motivated, respected individual. Bringing my 19 month old to a place where I myself have to be still and good is a challenge beyond my comprehension. Even though Anna's not a difficult toddler...she's just: A TODDLER.

I am amazed at the whole show that went on there yesterday. Truly amazed and it's just a reminder of how all kids and families are just different. It also again makes me question my perception of what I think is difficult about having a 19 month old. Maybe it truly isn't as hard as I'm making it in my mind?

My colorist and I agreed to bring Anna next time just to see what would happen. But oh yeah, with SpaceDaddy in the waiting room for back-up. Ha!

Nice shot, SpaceDaddy!

Going through the camera pics today, I found this one. I'm usually the one to really take pictures around here (thus I am virtually absent from photos of Anna's life), so I examined closer.



Looks like SpaceDaddy thought to bust me on Anna's video monitor while trying to clip her fingernails while she slept last night. I always thought it might be humorous for him to watch me sneak in and run away, flashlight in mouth, everytime she made a single movement. Last night I ran in and out of that room so much I gave up after getting only her THUMB nail clipped. I guess I'll have to try again tonight.

Pray for me.

I think she missed me

I have been away all weekend so I missed her from Friday till just yesterday when my plane came back in time to pick her up from school. I got a big hug, which is usual when I pick her up, but I think this one was a little longer :) I had to hold back the tears because her teachers didn't know I'd been away: geeze, long day lady? When I got home, SpaceDaddy already had dinner started and we played and ate till bedtime. At bedtime, she didn't want to let me go so she and I snuggled awhile and sang ABC's till she finally gave in to sleep. She woke at 2:30am in a coughing fit and when I went in to help, she had a hard time letting me go again. I hate that cough. Last year it lasted from October to January. Look at that, it's right on schedule. I am NOT letting this one go until Jan. No way, no how. I am giving it one more week before I intervene.

She seemed extra happy this morning, like the pre- "Up Yours" Anna. We are pretty sure her bottom right gums are red where her canine tooth may be coming in.

I got extra hugs and smiles and kisses this morning. Ahhhh...

She has learned more words since I left. And she is starting to put two words together. I was only gone for 3.5 days! This morning she was repeating EVERYTHING I said, much more clearly than ever. Plus she helped make her breakfast. She likes to help to do everything, which is a blessing and a curse. Mostly it's cute. It's the talking that kills me because it's really cool. What a little person she's becoming!

She sang her heart out on the way to school. I mean LOUD AND CLEAR. She cried when I left her but it actually wasn't her worst and it ended before I opened the door to leave, which was nice. She only has half a day, and it includes music class. The afternoon is with SpaceDaddy. I'll get her on Thurs afternoon again.

I am glad to be home!

It looks like we get fall back

The weather today has been beautiful!

Anna is back at school. I hope it went well...I mentioned her latest oppositional behavior stints to her teachers and they just looked at me like, "yeah, and...?"

Did I mention I am new at this?

Just in case, I left them with a new bottle of Children's Motrin :)

A Letter to my 8 month old

I found this on my computer...a letter I started to Anna on her 8 month birthday. The intention was to write letters like this monthly. That was almost a year ago and not another letter since...but lots of photos and the start of this blog. Anyway, here's the letter. It jogged some memories.

Nov 8, 2007:

Good morning, Anna! Happy eight month birthday! Sorry it has taken me 8 months to start writing to you. I hadn’t thought to do it, really because I’m just not a very sentimental person that way! But I thought now even though it’s late, it’s something. I can give you a quick rundown of your first 8 months, though.

The first night we brought you home from the hospital, you screamed for almost 2 hours, inconsolably! Nanee was here and tried to help but was stumped. Daddy ran out at 1am to the drug store to get some Mylicon! Not sure if it helped but you calmed down shortly after. We tried all kinds of pacifiers that night, and you hated them. I tried nursing, but it didn’t calm you. So we just bounced you and tried to shush you. That screaming episode carried over for about the first 3 weeks of your life, each night getting earlier and earlier. It made Daddy sad to hear you so upset so I would stay up with you, trying to soothe you. Nothing really worked, except lots of bouncing, so that’s what I did! Plus I made up a silly “everyone loves Anna” song to sing to you, even though I don’t really think that helped either! We just had to wait it out with you every night. At your 4 week doctor’s visit, you were diagnosed with acid reflux. That explained all of the crying, which became much more frequent, the choking during feeding, and arching the back while feeding. Those things stressed me out! But you were a beautiful, dark-haired baby, very alert, and gave lots of fake smiles along with little sighs you’d breathe while you nursed. You were sweet and loved to be bounced! You hated the swing but loved the rough bouncy seat, a rough stroller ride, and you’d love for mommy and daddy to stand with you under the noisy vent hood over the stove. That was the one sure way to get you to calm and sleep. We lived under the vent hood for about 2-3 months! Amazingly, though you were a horrible napper, you started sleeping through the night from 9 or 10pm till 5am very early, probably around 7 weeks old. I remember the first time you slept 7 hours straight was when we were visiting Nana in Austin. We were all surprised. I also remember the first time you let me put you down to play without crying to be picked up…that was around 7 weeks as well. You were fussy and so I put you down, which made you happy! Before that night, you didn’t like to be put down because you liked to be comforted from the reflux pain. But the Prevacid we were giving you was finally starting to work and you learned about a whole new world of floor-play! That night also was at Nana’s in Austin. You had so much fun there, then when we got home you were fussy again so I thought you must hate your home! Speaking of first times, I remember the first time you smiled and meant it, probably around 7 weeks old. We were having a horrible morning and I was leaning over you in tears. Then you smiled at me! What?! I smiled back, even with the tears. That is the same smile that still makes my day everytime you do it!

At 2 months old, you finally took a paci! Thank goodness! One afternoon you were fussing yourself into a nap and daddy tried again at one of the several different paci’s we’d tried in the past, but this time you took it, and fell asleep right on the floor all by yourself! Since then, it has been very helpful in getting you to sleep or better enjoy the car ride! Also, when you were 8 weeks old, you came to mommy’s PhD graduation ceremony, and then the next night you went with mommy and daddy to see Gwen Stefani in concert in the Woodlands. You did really well! We danced and you slept J. Also at around 2 months old you started to enjoy your swing and actually take long naps in it. You don’t use it at home anymore because by now you nap in your crib like a big girl. So we are about to put the swing away for good, even though you do still nap in the swings at day care. You started sleeping in your own crib upstairs like a big girl at 2 months old. At 10 weeks old, we took you to the swamp camp in Morgan City. Your first boat ride! You did really great! I remember you slept through till 5am and I was shocked. Also you played by yourself a whole lot in the Pack-N-Play when we hung colorful towels over the sides for you to look at. You were really happy. Again, I was stunned you played by yourself for so long! Aunt Kristyn and I took some great pictures of you playing in there. You were soooo pretty. By the way, you are known for being a pretty baby…no, beautiful baby. And it’s true…I’m not just saying that. Everyone says it, and they always qualify it as, “and I really mean it, not all babies are this pretty. Yours is REALLY pretty.” It’s the eyes you got from your daddy. I think you have my mouth, though! But everyone sees you as looking like your daddy, which is OK. I was hoping you’d have his eyes J But we never expected you to be so pretty, really!

At 3 months old, you started day care at G D. Johnna and Joy were your teachers. Mommy didn’t cry when I left you for your first day because when I left, you were playing and happy. Daddy had some tears J . They had so many fun things for you to do! Since you were happy, I was happy. Plus I was ready to begin life back in the real world J. You have done really great with G D since then. They moved you to Infant II when you were about 5 months old. I thought you were too little to go but you seemed to like it in Infant II. At 3.5 months old, you started waking up in the middle of the night…no more sleeping straight through! And you started going to bed earlier and earlier, until eventually you settled on a 6:30pm bedtime! Also at 3 months, you rolled over from tummy to back. A few weeks later, you rolled from back to tummy. Since then, even to this day, you are better going from back to tummy than from tummy to back. You still get mad when you get too tired to bother turning off of your belly and we have to do it for you. Sometimes you just get lazy! Tummy time was never your favorite thing, but you started enjoying the exersaucer Tami gave us. At 3 months old, you also got Ducky, which is a big yellow duck you picked out yourself. He goes with you to day care and you sleep with him at night.

At 4 months old, we started to feed you baby food. You started to like it, but then got a really bad cold, and then hated it from then on. Even day care was surprised you hated solids! It’s OK, solids were just for fun. But mommy had already stocked up on over $100 worth of baby food, thinking you’d dig in! The good news is that I got all that for $5 since I found some really good Target coupons! So we ended up donating it all a few months later when it looked like you’d never take to pureed baby food!

At 5 months old, you got better at going to sleep all by yourself at night, without needing daddy to help you. By the way, it was daddy who helped you get to sleep. He’d place you in your crib and “ssshhhhhh” you while stroking your hair and you’d cuddle your face into Ducky. You were usually pretty restless, but by 5 months old, you figured it out and went to sleep without much help from daddy, and without much flip-flopping around your crib. However, at this age you started waking up in the middle of the night realizing you were on your tummy and we’d have to go in, turn you over, and give you the paci or bottle to get you back to sleep J. At this time, you were usually up around 10pm for a paci, midnight for a bottle, and 3:30am for a bottle. Daddy had the shift till 2am, and mommy had 2am-wake up. That worked out well!

At 6 months old, mommy and daddy took our first trip away from you to Chicago so mommy could accept an award and give a speech. Nana came to stay with you and you must have had fun with her because when we got home you didn’t seem to have missed us! 6.5 months you also came to Colorado with us so mommy could speak at a CSU student conference. You were teething on that trip, but did a really great job other than the occasional crankiness with that tooth (although you were most cranky right before mommy’s presentation)! You did really great on your first airplane trip to Colorado on Southwest Airlines and even sat in the cockpit! You slept through your first boarding and take-off on mommy’s shoulder. You sat in daddy’s lap for your first landing. You enjoyed Colorado, and we went to all the places mommy and daddy used to go while we were students there. We were excited to show you everything! You even went to Estes Park with us and got to go inside the Stanley hotel and Rocky Mountain National Park. There, you got your first touch of a Colorado creek. We had so much fun with you! 6 months was the best month so far because everything was funny to you and you were sooo full of smiles. Even the first 2 teeth didn’t ruin your happiness! During that time, Nana was staying with us because daddy has just opened his physical therapy clinic and Nana was helping with that and with you! She had so much fun with you for the 6 weeks she was here. You used to make each other smile! You also started sitting up at around 6.5 months. Also during this month, you got such fluid build up in your ears from congestion that you lost your hearing! Mommy and daddy and your teachers were worried until the doctor told us it was just fluid build up, and 2 weeks of Benadryl cleared it up! Whew! It was such a busy month for you!

Month 7 came with a happy baby, but more opinionated baby. Nana went back to Austin after 6 weeks, and mommy went to Las Vegas for the weekend with some friends. Daddy called mommy telling me he was having tummy pain, and he was a little worried because nobody was around to help if it got serious. When I came back home, daddy went to the hospital to have his appendix removed! He was there for 4 nights, and we missed him lots. But you and mommy hung out and got through while daddy recovered. In the meantime, you were sprouting 2 new top teeth. Not everything was as funny anymore, and you demanded to be carried face-out instead of on my shoulder like I was used to! You also preferred to bear weight, which always made you most happy. You got better at sitting and playing on the floor with different toys, and putting them all in your mouth. We also realized that since you hated baby food, maybe you’d like grown up food. And we were right, since you attacked daddy’s home-made chicken noodle soup! So you started eating off the school menu at day care during this time and you’ve enjoyed everything from pizza to pancakes. We love it! Also at 7 months, you went to Louisiana for Aunt Kristyn’s baby shower and you had a horrible virus that caused terrible diarrhea for like 7 days, including while we were in La! But it didn’t make you cranky at all, thankfully. It just resulted in some diaper rash and lots of dirty diaper changes! YUCK!

And now we’re in month 8. Sorry the previous months are just a blur written on this page! Today’s your first day as an 8 month old. You passed out so early last night because of Day Light Savings Time change. We fell backwards last weekend, and you were already an early bedtime baby and now it’s worse J. You’re usually ready for bed by 6:30 but last night you barely made it till 6! Last night after your bath, you fell asleep on the bottle and I couldn’t keep you awake. You woke up at 4am for a bottle, then went back to sleep till 6:40. Wow! Daddy got home just 5 minutes after you went to bed and was sorry he missed you so he went upstairs to kiss you goodnight. These days you are starting to say mamamama, and I think you may be starting to mean it. You still say dadadada, which you’ve said since our vacation in Estes Park, CO in September (and you didn’t mean it then). You are enjoying to splash more and more in the bathtub, and you’re really enjoying your bath toys. There is one octopus in particular that you like when I use it to squirt water into your mouth! The first few times I squirted you with it, you laughed. Now you just want the water so you open your mouth and stick out your tongue. But really I think your favorite toy is still Temperature Ducky, even though Nana bought you a few other yellow rubber ducks. Out of the bath, you’re getting better about not fussing at me so much! You used to hate the drying and dressing part, and I don’t know why. But you’re doing better about it now. Speaking of dressing, you hate, and have always hated, getting dressed! Specifically the part of getting your hands into the sleeves. It’s even worse when you’re tired. We try little tricks to distract you, like giving you toys or sitting you up to put your sleeves through, which sometimes work. For now during changing time, you like to try to roll onto your belly and reach for the diapers and wipes. The wipes are your favorite, probably because they make a crinkly noise when you play with them. I always try to make you laugh to try to get a look into that silly mouth of yours. We noticed yesterday that you’ve got a 5th tooth coming in, on your bottom right. I knew something was going on in there because you’ve been cranky lately, but Daddy found the actual white bumps and he showed me this morning. Good girl! I know tooth pain really hurts! You are doing great with it, though! You get pretty cranky at school with Miss Polly, Kathleen, and Denise, but at least it doesn’t affect your sleep at home at night J. In the meantime, you’ve got this terrible cough that has lasted about 4 weeks now, and I am about to call the pedi to see if there’s something I should do here! You’ve also had a runny nose and you HATE it when I wipe it! Boy do you fuss me!

Spacedaddy saves bath time

As part of her new-found attempts to defy mommy and daddy, bath time (her favorite activity) is no exception. So she immediately started fussing at me when I placed her butt in the tub last night.

Paul had taught her a few nights ago how to wash her own hair. He happened to be present at this bath last night, and when the fussing started he asked her if she could wash her own hair. So she did and bath time was fun again. Followed by "Up Yours" when I tried to get her out of the now-cold water 30 min later.

Months and months of mommy bathtime made fun turned not-fun and then revived again with a brief, new tactic by Spacedaddy that involved Anna's participation instead of just playing with her usual bath toys. I think that the fresh, new approach to stuff is going to be required around here over the next few years. I am going to have to learn to get creative, I guess.

Up yours

If she could tell me, "Up Yours", I think she would.

Still, on the way out the door this morning she told me, "I Love You!" and "Happy Birthday!"

What a little Thug Muffin.

She is home with Paul today because Tues afternoons she is with him. Thurs afternoons she is with me. But this morning Paul had an open schedule this morning and so wanted to keep her with him again all day. I wanted her to go to school this morning because she has music and story time today, but then the weather turned crappy so I figured fine. Although this will do nothing to help her routine/schedule, which is now only a scaffolding of what it used to be.

She sat captivated last night through about 20 DVR play-backs of a brief Sleeping Beauty music video ("If I know You") that popped up on the Disney channel (again, thank you DVR). I was amazed that she was amazed. She's never seen a Disney movie cartoon. Here is this Sleeping Beauty chick singing to a bunch of forest animals about her dreamy prince that she's met in a dream, and my daughter, who knows NOTHING about princesses and fairy tales and all that stuff, is mesmorized. The voice of the woman is obviously that of a 40's-50's era sound, but it's timelsss to Anna's ears. Disney knows it can make Baby crack- an addiction for even 19 month-olds. It blows my mind and defies my theory that little girls only like girlie things, like Princesses, because they're taught to. Hopefully the draw to these movies for such little ones is that they're embedded with subliminal messages that say, "Don't tell your mommy and daddy 'Up Yours'". Maybe that's really what she's attracted to?

After the first 10 runs of the video, she got up and asked me to dance. That was fun and sweet!! Then: "Up Yours" when I told her it was bath time.

Terrible Two's or Teething?

Anyone know why our usually happy toddler has become extra clingy, outright defiant, and actually cries more these past few days? Hitting, swinging, "NO!", throwing, running away from putting shoes on and diaper changes (God forbid me to try and put her hair up in one of those cutsie pony-tails, or clip her nails, or ask her to brush her teeth). She even cried at bath time, which she usually loves! She has been waking from her naps with cries, complete with tears, that continues on for a good 30 min even after she's sitting in my lap and I've caved in to giving her the paci. Usually she wakes from naps all happy and singing in her bed. Her morning wake ups have remained happy. Just the naps suck. She even fought naps and bedtime last week, though no issues the past 3-4 days. Hey all you experienced moms, will Motrin cure this or are we in for the Terrible Two's?

She would totally act this way when she was teething as a baby. But now she's a toddler and I think the last round of teeth were probably 4-5 months ago (the molars) so I'm not quite sure what to expect from her at this age. She is, afterall, more of a little person who may express her pain and misery differently now. So is this it, or have the terrible two's hit us at 2 days shy of 19 months old? I have always heard it all starts at 18 months, so I have been bracing myself. We're not seeing any irritation around her canine teeth that are supposed to come it at this time. She has always been right on schedule with her teething. In between the bouts of frustrated tantrums and clinginess, I can see glimpses of happy Anna.

I am so confused! If this is the Terrible Two's, fine! Bring it on! If this is Teething, fine, bring that too! I would just like to know what we're up against, one way or another.

Another walk home

On the stroller ride home from the high school football game this evening (week 2 of the ones Paul's been working), it was cool out, breezy and clear and happy. Anna leaned back sideways in her stroller to get a good look at the sky and sing to her Toddler Action Songs that were playing on the MP3 player. She looked all around the sky as it was darkening and repeatedly pointed out, "MOON!" "STAR!" "AIRPLANE!" Ahhh....she is her mommy and daddy's daughter for sure.

So sweet. Super smart. I love her.

Now, she's sleeping...to bed with zero issues. Now I've gotta sneak in and trim her nails. Did I mention that this week she's decided she will not have her nails clipped? Silly girl, now you must roll around in your own trimmings!

Please oh please don't wake up...

Sweet

This morning she gave me a kiss bye-bye and this time she actually turned around, came back and asked me for a hug: "hug?" and reached out to hug me. Ahhhh...this was a first. She gives hugs, yes, but usually you have to ask (unless you're a dog or a little buddy). She doesn't even know how cute she is.

When Paul doesn't work the hospital

Too tired to write yesterday! To sum it up, cool morning air, good Sunday morning family breakfast, 2 mile run as a family (with a happy toddler in the stroller), playing with new safari animals (toys), a local T-ball game, ice cream with a little friend, a delayed nap (we pushed her), a cranky wakening (she pushed back), a garage cleaning and toddler clothes shopping, dinner, bath, bedtime (8PM!), groceries, I got a bath, and a book.

This kind of hard play comes when Paul is home and not working at the hospital on weekends. Nonstop. My feet hurt.

We are tired parents

Did all of this really happen in one day?

The girls' naps only lasted a little over an hour each, when we were counting on the usual solid 2 hours at LEAST. But we think they set their little secret alarm clocks to get just the minimal rest they need before they could get up and play again.

So on to the truck washing in the beautiful weather. Not my truck. Paul's. I don't see the point in washing the outside of a truck. They were meant to get dirty so I'll never be washing mine. I wash the INSIDE since that's where I spend most of my time...right?








To sum it up, more playing (including a slide in the front yard), more snacks, diaper changes, and then AJS went home. Then we went to drop off the recycling, ate dinner at Cafe Express, and topped it off with a Toys R Us visit before Anna started rubbing her eyes at around 7:30. Singing They Might Be Giants all the way home, bath, and night night.

Paul and I are happy to be chilling out right now. Whew.

Flexible Age

The coolest thing so far at 18 months has been our most recent surprise at the fact that Anna is more flexible with our schedules, including the ability to stay up later, which means we can start to have somewhat of a social life again that also includes her. Plus she can be kinda fun. Last night Paul wanted to cut the grass at around 6pm. Usually, we'd wait till Anna goes to bed so we can spend time with her, and she'd go to bed by 7 or so and there'd be plenty of light left to cut the grass. The fun thing about last night's grass cutting (fun? What have I become?) is that Paul went ahead with the cutting at around 6:30 and we hung outside to watch/help till almost 7:30. Imagine that, getting stuff done AND hanging out with Anna. BONUS! In the last 12 months leading up to this event, this would have never worked: Anna would have been an eye-rubbing sleepy-head mess by 6:30 and I'd have had to stick with her bedtime schedule/routine. But last night, the weather was nice and cool and dry, the mosquitos were mostly dead or repelled, and Anna was wide awake, fed, and happy. So we just hung out with Paul while cutting the grass. She even wanted to ride in the stroller she saw in the garage so we rode around our yard and she loved it. Simple and fun. It may not mean much to the non-parents who read this, but it represents alot to me.

She used to HATE the stroller, with the exception of her first few months of life when a bumpy, grassy ride at near Shaken-baby-syndrome levels was one of the only 2 tricks that would work to quiet her.

So tonight I am going to try something new, if I can get over my anxiety about it. I am going to attempt to take her out in her stroller to watch the local high school football game in our neighborhood that Paul is covering tonight for as long as she'll care to be there.

Remember my momentum theory? I think it's the root of my anxiety about taking Anna out for stuff like this. Momentum being that for the past year of my life and hers, I have had so many restrictions placed on what we do and where we go and the timing of it all centered around Anna's need for an early bedtime, that now anything off-schedual is a little nerve-wracking for me.

It's so much easier to stay home to watch TV but it would be more fun to enjoy the awesome weather at a high school football game where spacedaddy is working.

Rational thought: Get a grip, you're the mom.

Day Care drop-offs

I know Anna likes her day care/school. She gets nothing but good reports and I can tell she's learning stuff. I've dropped in several times over the past 15 months and she's happily playing with others or involved in something like a book. I see no suspicious behavior at home that I could correlate with something fishy at her school. But as I figured, this week the drop-offs have been especially hard.

Paul used to do the drop-offs and I would get the pick-ups. Since she was always a clinger/crier from month 12 on, I figured he got the raw end of that deal (although there was a period of about 2 weeks where she would just chew me out the second I showed up to pick her up...HOW DARE YOU LEAVE ME ALL DAY?!). Anyway, this week has been the worst we've ever seen of her screaming just as we walk into the door.

She happily trots down the hallways leading up to her classroom, pointing at stuff and telling strangers HI! Then as we get to the door of her classroom, the hesitation sets in. I try to coax her in with fun stuff instead of hauling her screaming on my own. But no, the coaxing isn't working. Today I led her in by her hand and when we crossed the door threshold, I looked down and her little scalp was actually red. In looking closer at her face, she is already in the middle of one of those big, quiet inhales that signals that an ear-piercing scream is forthcoming on the exhale. Yep, there it went. Just enough to show me that there's no sign of the canine teeth erupting anytime soon.

Anyway, I picked her up and we all tried to distract her. All three teachers, and even her toddler buddies tried, but she wasn't interested. I had no choice but to pass her off to Miss P as about two of the other toddlers started their sympathy crying. "I am so sorry" was all I could say, over and over. One screaming toddler = two more screaming toddlers.

When I dress her in the morning, and decide whether I'm going to do her hair all cute, I wonder what would look best and obtain more sympathy from her teachers while she screams as I leave in the morning.

As I passed her off to Miss P, she said something about the fact that it's obvious she's an only child. She didn't say it in any derogatory way or anything, and I didn't take offense. I actually agreed. Does this mean that non-first borns don't pull this crap because their parents don't have time to dode on them and give in to every demand? I think this is true anyway from what I've heard of parents with more than one kid. Anna's not usually so clingy, but I don't know...there are other first-borns in Anna's class. Do they cry too? Or is it only MY child? I am jealous that the other parents can just walk their toddlers in, tell them bye-bye, and leave without the drama. Honestly, I don't think she does this because she is spoiled, really. I have seen spoiled, and from what I've seen, this ain't it. I think she does this because she is smart and she is very much a part of our little family at home. Anna has brains behind her eyes and she knows "what's going on" and has always preferred consistency. That has been lacking for her since she was moved into the Toddler rooms at age 12 months. It has just never been the same. So now here we are, post-Ike, new teachers, new friends, new classroom. So yeah, she's taking it a little harder.

There is plenty of stuff out there telling me all about what separation anxiety is, and how some are worse than others. Fortunately, I think Anna's on the middle of the spectrum since her cries stop shortly after I leave and she is fine the rest of the day. But, like the car seat screaming phase, I am surprised at the fact that this has lasted 6 months! Before Ike, some days she'd cry, and others she would be fine. Now, she SCREAMS. I guess it'll take about another week or 2 till she gets it under some level of control again.

Magnificent Tantrum

Spacedaddy thought it would be cute and fun if Anna helped him make eggs this morning. He pulled up a step stool to the counter and asked her if she wanted to help.

Sucker.

Spacedaddy: Here, baby, you hold one end of the egg, I'll hold the other. Now crack it just like that. Wait, we don't want shells in there!
Anna: Ooooohhh, more? More?
Spacedaddy: OK, let's do anoth...wait, baby, you don't put your whole hand in the...
Anna: AAAAHHYYYYEEEE!!!!MMMIIINNNEEE!!!!
Spacedaddy: Wait, baby, see?
Anna: Oooohhh..
Spacedaddy: OK now we have to wash your hands.
Anna: No?! No!
Spacemama (dare I intervene): Anna, let's wash your hands.
Anna: Nooooo....AAAAHHHHHH!!!!!

I did get her hands washed, but what a wonderful display of cranky-off-schedule-18-month-old tantrum behavior that followed. She followed me all around the kitchen and living room, grabbing onto my shorts and trying to tell me how she hadn't wanted her hands washed. Spacedaddy was trying to do a fun thing. That is his nature. He can't wait till she is old enough to actually crack an egg without wanting to eat it right then and there. But credit to him, she did have fun until mommy made her wash the salmonella threat off of her hands.

After it was all over, we enjoyed eggs and biscuits (with jelly!). And a little milk.