The rides to and from school have been insanely blissful. The car seat fights are on hold until her next phase! Plus the new truck is super fun. Really fun.

Anna today

Here's a picture of our growing girl today. Paul said he measures her at 37" but that just can't be true...

Spring Time Santa Claus

I know it sucks, it's a picture of a picture

We went to the mall yesterday (what, never happens). We walked around to realize Santa was there doing the photo op thing. We brought Anna over to see what she thought. She watched. I asked if she wanted to sit on his lap like the other kids did and she said, "Ummm.No. I don't like him".

I tolder her he was nice and brought little kids toys on Christmas (oh look at me, indadvertently perpetuating the lie of Santa. Didn't even realize it till this whole affair was over. It's so engrained. I'm not against santa per se but was probably planning to approach it all more carefully....). After she saw the other kids hug him, and that he was handing out books to these kids, she agreed to sit on his lap for a photo. We stood in line, which was super short. I realized she had on a very spring-time outfit, since it was warm that day. She also had on the mis-matched shoes she'd just consented to buying a few minutes before. Not very photo-like but we were doing this for the $17 experience and (and 2 3x5 photos) to see how she was really going to respond. I should have had my own camera with video so I could have taped the whole thing myself. She actually sat on Santa's lap, and he asked her what she wanted for Christmas. Good thing we prepped her right before because even though this is her third Christmas, like Halloween, she has to learn it all over again...you get presents for Christmas! She pointed to the pile of books by Santa and said she wanted one. I saw Paul and Santa and Anna exchange a few words I didn't hear. Then she smiled for the picture. A little shy smile at first then we asked her to show her teeth and say cheese and got the perfect Anna-Santa picture yet with a really cute smile. Too bad she was in a springtime outfit. And for heaven's sake, Santa could have put a red coat on too. Oh well...if this whole thing had been planned, it never would have happened. Click here to see last year's attempt at a Santa shot...

I asked Paul over dinner what they talked about with Santa. He said they all agreed Anna would give Santa her paci's in exchange for Christmas gifts. OK, we'll see about that. Anyway I told that to Anna back in like March and I thought she'd forgotten it. But then a few weeks ago when I said something about Santa she said she was going to give him her paci for Christmas. She remembered!

No wonder she hated him right away.

The Family Truckster: Upgraded

The Family Truckster was supposed to be the 2002 Landrover Freelander I paid off just before the engine started to fall out of it. In haste I had to swap it for a 2002 Jeep back in 2007. For more details on the Jeep, click here. For the past year or so I've had my eye on a Lexus GX470, but it had to wait until finances were in order and then it had to be the perfect one: all the right colors and requirements.

Finally...a Lexus GX470 that meets all of my specifications: Used, affordable, dark blue, decent miles, clean. It even has a DVD player that will be handy for long trips. Like the one coming up this week to Arkansas to visit Paul's extended family for Thanksgiving. It's definitely the most comfortable vehicle we've ever owned. Craig Durrett of Durrett Motor Company here in Houston looked for it all year for me. He met Paul through Paul's clinic and treated us really, really well. Definitely the best place I'd recommend for a used vehicle. He found this truck for me at auction in NY and transported it down for me after sending me the specifications. Then he cleaned up all the dings and stains and I'd swear it's brand new. He was maticulous about it, which I appreciate! The thing is beautiful and rides like it's brand new. Paul and I checked out the "home" address in its GPS and it looks like its previous owner lived in downtown Manhattan, NY. So it was probably garage-kept, which is obvious since it's in such great shape. No smells, no pet hair. The crumbs from Anna's fruit bar yesterday are really all the mess that stands out in this truck (an dso it begins...sigh...).

Anyway, I'm not in love with having a car payment again after having been free for about 4 years. Yes I hear Dave Ramsey's little devil voice saying NO TO CAR PAYMENTS...and I've listened dutifully till now...now it's definitely affordable and it's used and now I don't really mind it.

My first thought when I climbed inside of it at the dealership was: "WOA this is wayyyyy too much vehicle for me!" Then I cranked up the volume on the stereo on the drive home and had to hold back the tears. Silly for just a vehicle, but the music sounded soooo full and sooo deep that I almost wished I were commuting again to UTMB.

And the heated seats come in handy too right about now...

It does fit in the garage, though not as tidy as my Jeep did. I'll miss the Jeep a bit. It did a GREAT job for us and never a problem. The miles are still super low. The Jeep does still smell of the smoker/pet owner who had it before me. Otherwise, it's a great hand-me-down that I traded in for $6,000 on the Lexus.

I got the biggest, most sincere (sorry honey) hugs I’ve ever gotten in my whole life from Anna when I reached the driveway Tuesday night! Complete with mmmoooommmmiiiieeeee!!!! Ahhhhh, that was the best EVER! And she was all SMILES and hugs the rest of the night. She loved the little things I brought her back from Paris, and for the past 2 nights she’s asked me to read Bonsoir Lune (Goodnight Moon) in French. She tries to repeat some of what I say too, which is really neat. (On that note, yesterday on the car ride home I could have SWORN she was saying something to me in Spanish. I can’t tell what the heck she was saying, I kept asking her to repeat it cause it sure wasn’t English! She does have Spanish class in school so I don’t know if she was twisting up some phrases she’s learning…).

She’s been super sweet since I’ve been home even though this morning we had a “Time Out” over brushing her teeth. She’s at a stage where it’s critical to crack down right away on crappy behavior after fair warning. So things are getting tougher for her but it’s all part of toddlerhood. Judging from the amazing leap in cognitive function I’ve seen just in the week I was gone, it’s clearer to me now that the car seat rages, nap skipping at school, and battles over clothing that went on over the previous few weeks (and smart-butt attitude) is all a result of a major developmental spurt she’s going through. Part of the Terrible Twos that for Anna come in groups of “good weeks” versus “bad weeks”. Phases, you know, rather than a steady trickle of “Terrible”.

So for now I’m enjoying the fact that she missed me tons. She’s being especially nice to me, whereas I was afraid it’d be the opposite J . And for my part I have noticed her sentences being more complex, she’s stating her feelings very clearly, and asking about ours. She’s really turning into a little person right before our eyes.

Paul took her to the grocery store while I was gone and he asked me the last time she’d been there. I don’t know, maybe 6 months? I never take her because I hate it in the first place and have no patience or time for toddler “toddling” or arguing over who pushes the cart. He said she was so excited to be there, it must have been like Disneyland or something! She wanted to ride in the cart, help with the food, and was full of “wow!” and excitement! To the point where Paul felt kinda bad for her to be so excited about the stupid grocery store! Good, the grocery store is a treat! Her head might explode if we took her to the mall again. She hasn’t been there in about 3-4 months. It’s not that we keep her house-bound. We just avoid places that are difficult enough already!

Anyway, the car seat screaming seems to have passed. She will try to pull her arm out of her seatbelt occasionally but we threaten to pull the car over and get out and she will comply with putting her arm back in the strap without escalating it much further. Unfortunately she’s back in the paci use in the car as a result of our desperation a few weeks ago. So Take III on dumping the car paci will come later. A few steps forward, and then a few backward. Hopefully the 8+ hour car ride to Paul’s relatives’ house in Arkansas for Thanksgiving will go smoothly (sigh). I keep thinking if we did 2 days to Colorado in the car and 2 days back, we can do this!

On Dec 3, Anna will be in her first little Christmas production at school. She’ll be an angel (with the other girls in her class) and the boys will be sheppards and she will also be a welcoming usher. Her teacher said they picked her to be an usher (to welcome the parents, etc) with David because Anna is so “outgoing” etc. I never know if she’s kindly trying to tell me Anna is a booger or what. I don’t know the other kids in Anna’s class so I don’t know the relative levels of “outgoing” J but either way she’ll be an usher and an angel. I canceled a trip to DC when I realized it conflicted with this. Can’t miss her first little Christmas show! Even if she rips the wings and halo right off!

Well I think that’s about all. Anna’s turning into a 3 year old faster and faster...

Little gym

Wow. Just got an email saying they're closing the Little Gym Anna goes to. Not sure why but it closes Nov 21. Frankly, even though Anna liked it, she hasn't been in the last 3 weekends because of car seat fights and other reasons. Well I guess that makes my decision easier on whether or not to re-enroll her next semester. Oh well at least she still has (and loves) the Tumblebus that comes to her school weekly.

Going home!

This was written yesterday, 11/17:

I'm at the Paris airport super early waiting for my flight home. I survived the longest trip away from Anna yet! Seven nights away and Paul says she misses me pretty badly. We'll see about that. A few weeks ago when I went to Indiana for 2 nights she was hot and cold when I came home. I probably won't make it home in time for her bedtime yet but I'll see her when she wakes up. Her Paris souvenirs include French versions of Goodnight Moon and Sleeping Beauty, a new hairbrush, a kid's Paris bowl, and a fun toothbrush holder.

Paris is a neat city with lots of great history. I'm glad I got to go with the work buddies, which was fun and overall less expensive for me! But as cool as it was, it's not a place I'm in a rush to get back to...hard to explain but it's not a place I'd choose to spend my money on returning just as a vacation. People were super friendly, the city is surprisingly clean, and the costs aren't too outrageous. Given its 2,300 or so years of history (300 BC!!), it sure has paid its dues in blood to be what it is today. Frankly, my uncultured, American-ized mind could only compare it to Epcot :) or NYC in terms of its grandure. Is that bad???!! Ha!

I must say my french improved over the days and I even had the confidence to ask questions in french. At first I realized I didn't understand the answer :) but even that improved.

Having an out-of-sync biological clock meant I didn't even know when I was hungry and I could even stay out later because sleep and eat physiology was all over the place. But honestly I'm looking fwd to the regulation again. I guess it's a part of my control freak factor.

There was no treadmill near me (nor was there time and energy) so while I got plenty of walking miles, the running group might be painful when I get home!

I've been blogging and Twittering from my blackberry, which is a loaner from work for this trip. I never even used my laptop while there except to review some data I could talk through with Chiaki Mukai (JAXA astronaut and lead scientist). On the job front, I can't even believe how lucky I am to have this job. And the timing is unbelievable. There are lots more good things to come and I'll get to be in the thick of it! SWEET!

Is Thanksgiving next week? Here we go...

Today was not a work day for us here in Paris. For today and tomorrow Tracy and I stayed in Paris to be tourists. We started out by sleeping in just a little (by the way my body clock has zero idea what time it is now that I eat and sleep on a schedule my hormones have never seen before! We navigated the subway to the hop on/off buses with the open air deck and rode back to Notre Dame. There we visited the archaeological crypts of centuries of Paris buildings preserved as layers progressed over time.

We then hopped on the bus to the catacolmbs but were super disappointed to learn they were closed to visitors due to vandalism! Bastards!

Went to the Concierge where prisoners of the revolution were held before be-headed including Queen Marie Antoinette. Bought some tourist crap, ate tourist food (yum!) And went back to the Notre Dame in time for Sunday mass where we watched mass and communion. Talk about holy religion, batman! That place is amazing.

It just amazes me how much bloodshed in history is over religion. Wow.

Ended our night with a boat ride and dinner and I even held a fun conversation with a patient cabbie. All the french I took in school is coming back to me and it's actually useful.

Tomorrow's our last day here so we're cramming it all in ;) I'm ready to get back to my little family and it sounds like just in time: Anna threw the cat halfway down the stairs as Paul was on the phone with me! Luckily they bounce back.

Eiffel Tower

Today was a long and productive day but my brain is on overload! So much information from international partners on science while still fightng a bit of jet lag (though not as bad as yesterday). After all the crap I pulled to stay awake yesterday I couldn't get to sleep last night till 1:30 or so. Ah well. Hopefully tonight will be easier. We are headed to the Eiffel Tower for dinner as a group and we'll be getting back late again. Last night I ate raw scallops in lime and basil (yay me) and the night before I tried snails (not bad in garlic and cheese and butter). But I still couldn't bring myself to touch the fish in the cafeteria today :)

I talk to Paul daily. Anna seems to have gotten over the carseat crap and has apparently moved on to the "whine about everything" phase according to Paul. We expected it the closer we get to 3 yrs old. I miss them both!!

I like this loaner Blackberry. It's easier to text with than my IPod. Carrying them both around is great power ;)

Ok gotta run downstairs for dinner.

Paris is great

I'm really enjoying this trip. All the cool Paris stuff aside, I'm surrounded by people who love the International Space Station. I'm still not sure how I got so lucky with this job! Tonight I met the man who discovered nuclear anti-matter and a Nobel laureate. But the trip is bitter sweet because I'm missing Paul and Anna-Marie. Already can't wait to get my squeezes all around when I get home on the 17th. Till then, we are working as a group of scientists who are preparing a vision statement for ISS research. I'm not sure how I got this lucky but I'll take it!

When I'm not posting from my blackberry I'll post pictures. In the meantime I update my Twitter frequently. You can follow my Tweets by checking along the right side bar on my blog page or get a Twitter account and follow me (@spacemama). Now I'm not sure but I think my confused body clock is telling me to sleep. I've been looking forward to it all day! Even 4 cups European coffee and a double espresso couldn't fight the jet lag. I did pee a lot though ;) Bon soir!

I'm still on the plane to Paris writing this entry as a draft that I
can upload when we land and I find wifi.

Oh hang on, I can't write right now...we are in the final 30 min of
our flight and I need to watch this sunrise! Good morning France!

Mrs. Ruttley-

Thanks for loaning the class the car seat. Anna was the first one in it and enjoyed showing her classmates how to be safe- What a GREAT idea. She fell asleep for nap around 1:30.

Dawn

It was a decent ride home. Still I feel like the straps are too loose but we can work on that bit by bit. She squirmed at first but I kept talking to her and distracting her and she was very proud of herself in the car seat. She did ride home with her arm between the chest straps and her chest but she asked if she could do that and I said yes. Step by step...

So the round trip was great, just like the old days, with looser straps. When we got home, it was tons of praise and she was so excited! Hell, so was I. In fact I had enough energy for her to help me cook scrambled eggs for her dinner...she cracked the eggs into the bowl, stirred them up, dumped them into the pan, and helped me stir them in the pan (carefully!) while they cooked.

Packing, bath, and bedtime (with a bit of a fight thrown in on the last one).

Here's hoping the car ride to school tomorrow is just as good.

She called it Temper Tantrums

Well the pediatrician had to call it something to charge our insurance...after an epic battle of mommy vs Toddler in getting her to keep her shirt on, literally and figuratively, I decided a conference with a professional in toddler behavior was in order. Paul and I wanted to get a feel for if this is some real sensory issue for her or if she was just being a control freak like her mother. Anna's pedi is out of town so we saw a back-up. Given Anna's history etc etc etc, sounds like it could be that she hates the restriction and the tantrums (major, out of con trol ones by the way) about putting her shirt on and buckling the seatbelt stem from a very real feeling of uncomfort and the total loss of control. I'm sure it's true of most toddlers who take issue with the car seat. The pedi had a car seat screamer too and at least could empathize. But all we can do is power through the screams and struggles and pull the car over when she squeezes out.

That is, until someone sees me wrestling with my "innocent" toddler in the back seat and calls CPS. I swear I am waiting for my phone to ring.

The weird part about all of this is: why NOW? Why all of the SUDDEN? We had this exact same phase for almost 2 weeks back in May (remember?) but powered through it by waiting it out, blaming the teething, and giving back the paci.

We can't find anything to blame (some major developmental spurt maybe?), and she's a lot bigger and harder to deal with than in May. And yesterday, out of desperation, I gave the paci back in the car. It was a painful decision after having been successfully paci free since August, but here we are. In the long run we figured weaning off the paci later would be less painful than a development of a car seat aversion so we went with it. It didn't help yesterday. I had to pull over 4 times to get her back into the car seat on the way home. I yanked the paci and kept it as a bargaining tool. But in the end, she was too crazed to care.

The sad thing is she really WANTS to be good in the car seat. She will get into the truck and say she's not going to cry in the car seat and then when the belts come on, she starts to squirm and is obviously uncomfortable. That turns to screams and we're off! Is this what the toddler articles mean when they say toddlers hate to be strapped into the car seat? Are they all this crazy?

In May she screamed till she threw up once. This time she's screamed till she passed out. I feel like her throat must be sore from all of the screaming! All I want to do is hug her when we get home because she is so incredibly distraught but there has to be Time Out served first.

For some strange reason, this morning's car ride started out a bit rough but never got into screams or cries. Somehow she got comfortable and held back when she wanted to act crazy. I went into overtime using everything from stuff outside to her toddler music as a distraction to keep her cool (don't think I haven't tried all of this already, because I have - it's the obvious tactics, and they hadn't worked these past 2 weeks). For some reason today we got through. The straps were loose while still safe, and her hand was down her shirt for some reason that was comforting, but she was comfortable and it was a pleasant ride. I wonder if the ride home will be OK. There's nothing like being horribly screamed at by someone you just want to love to completely ruin your day.

It occurred to me this morning to ask her teacher if I could leave Anna's car seat in the class room today and let the kids all get a lesson on wearing their seat belts. She said that it was the perfect fit for their health/safety hour today and so she would focus on being safe in the car seat. My thought is that if she sees her friends do it, she might be OK too. But I'd be interested to see how this turns out. I suspect Anna will realize it's HER car seat and not let anyone else sit in it. Will she let the teachers buckle her in with no grief? Hmmmm...at least it's a creative idea I am giving myself credit for attempting ;)

As if this car seat and now shirt thing weren't bad enough, it's just in time for us to go out of town and for her to spend the weekend with Paul's mom. Paul drops her off on Friday (after a 3 hour car ride...during which she might scream herself into a coma) and pick her up on Monday. Paul gave his mom the background on this car seat thing and it sounds like it runs in his family! SO IT'S ALL HIS FAULT. I hope he got the point across to her seriously, that this could get surprisingly ugly. What's worse is he told me she plans to bring Anna out to the camp, which requires a car ride of about 45 min to Morgan City, then a brief boat ride, which would be fun for Anna except the fact that she's going to lose her mind when they put the life jacket on her...

I'm not sure how I'll enjoy myself this weekend knowing Anna's possibly making Paul's mom as nutso as she's made us over this restrictive thing. I can only hope the phone calls will say that she's being great (maybe the new environment will make her forget her hatred of the car seat). In the meanitme, I'm not sure how many shirts I'm supposed to pack for her since she cycles through about 5 every morning, in beteen Time Outs, until she finds one semi-comforatble. Then I get on a plane for Paris on Tuesday afternoon, for a full 7 days gone. So there's mega guilt of leaving Paul alone with no moral support for Anna's current state of insanity on top of the typical travel mom guilt I already have.

So my first trip overseas will be bitter sweet. BTW, this Paris trip is for my job, oui, oui!

This morning Anna's teacher showed me (proudly, I might add) her potty training sheet. She had a ton of stars for pee-peeing on the potty (her teacher calls it tee-tee...ick) and is doing really fabulous! We're very nearly "there" with the potty. Whatever that means...

Lord.

Trick or Treat

I remember this time last year teaching her to say Trick or Treat. And she was a Denver Broncos cheerleader, a little thing carefully running up and down the streets. This year she was a lady bug (for the most part). She refused to wear the headband with the antennae so I cut the antennae off the head band and snuck them into her pigtails. Score one for me. She refused to wear the lady bug wings around her shoulders so I safety-pinned it to her back. She only was annoyed with it at the very last house! The leggings are blue...closest I had to black because it was a little chilly out tonight (and she would refuse black tights). By the way, PERFECT Halloween weather! She was great at saying Trick or Treat and Thank You! It's her third Halloween but it's amazing she doesn't even realize she's done this before. Last year she was old enough to go up to the doors and get a little candy too. Doesn't even remember it. Our group of kids are getting older. Usually we just walk up and down one and a hlaf streets but this time we kept going and made some blocks. It was really fun because there were lots of Trick Or Treaters out.

Pre-Anna we'd have had a big dinner for friends and give out candy. Halloween is our favorite holiday. These days most of the friends have moved away, or are busy, and I can't summon the energy this year. Every minute is consumed with things to do so every chance I have to do nothing is nice...

Gotta go prep for Monday night's class.

Little Lady, GET IN THE CAR SEAT

Anna’s been calling herself a “lady” lately. Must be something she picked up at school! I asked her if she was mommy’s girl and she said, “No, I’m a lady”. It makes Paul nuts because it implies she’s older and he’d like to keep her his baby. But I think it’s cute as hell. Especially if you call her “Little Lady.”

 

In other news, she’s now pee-peeing on the potty regularly, including at school. But she’s skipping naps at school, making her a mess for the evening. Not sure what’s going on there but we’re hoping that the time change will help things since it’ll be later for her biological clock and so maybe she’ll be more tired. She still sleeps 2-3 hours for naps on the weekend.

 

It’s been car seat HELL all week. I literally have to climb on top of her to force her in and buckle the belts. She screams the whole way home but I’ve gotten ear plugs so that helps ME! It’s just awful. Twice she passed out in the car from her screams. She just keeps screaming “It’s Too Tight!!!” but it’s not. We can’t figure it out. She’s less crazy in the mornings but worse in the afternoons. We’ve tried everything, including positive and negative reinforcement and nothing is working. It’s prevented us from doing a few fun things this week just because we can’t get past the car seat to get into the car and go anywhere. She was this bad back in May when she was teething but now we can’t find an excuse. Also she’s been a cranky, defiant booger the last week or two. So either she’s not feeling well, or it’s another developmental phase we will just have to adjust to. I think it’s the developmental thing.

 

The thing is when she’s this crazy, it ruins my day too. The other day I was walking down the hall at work and realized something was bugging me. I didn’t know what it was so when I thought it through I realized that when she’s cranky and defiant, it affects my day. So there you have it.

 

Our last resort with the car seat is that we’re going to go and buy her a booster seat this weekend. There are a few available for 2 year olds. The straps are still the same 5 point harness so I’m not sure how far we’ll get but it’s worth a try. Maybe if she helps to pick out the right one, it’ll work. Here’s hoping!